I frequently get asked: How was Italy??
Honestly, I have no idea how to answer that question.
It was mind blowing.
It was liberating.
It was the most amazing six weeks of my life.
It is the most beautiful place I've ever seen.
It was more than I can ever put into words.
Every moment was perfect.
It was a dream....
Indeed, it feels like it was a dream....I feel like I hibernated for six weeks. I escaped every oppression that I've ever felt and I lived. I LIVED. I loved. I laughed. I cried. I learned. I had fun, more fun than some have in a lifetime. I felt. My God, I really felt who I was and what I wanted. I felt complete, totally and wholly complete--- for the first time in my life.
But now I'm here. And it's slipping...
I may be different, but my life is going back into a routine...
I haven't even been home a week and I'm starting to feel like I was never gone. How this is possible?!?!? I don't know....but Italy feels like sand slipping through my fingers. I want to hold on to it. I don't want a single grain of sand to leave me, but it is. My insides scream: I can't go back to the way it was before. I CAN'T!!! But like an hour glass turned upside down, I feel like I am being drained. Italy seems so far, so far....I want to reach out and touch it, just one more time...
I had that moment at work today. That moment when you look around the room and go "what the heck am I doing??!?!". I looked at my computer screen, I looked at my amazing co-workers walking around the office, I saw the work piled on my desk...and I blinked. "Is this my life?!??!"....NO, no, no...this isn't real?!?!?
I am so eternally grateful I met Court and Bella....so grateful for a million and one reasons. One reason though, is that I have someone who understands---because no one understands....
Some things in life don't change---but I did change. I will not let myself be the way I was before. I will remember. I will hold on to my strength, I will hold onto what I learned, I will hold onto my memories...I will hold on to bella Italia.
How was Italy?
My response: Indescribable! You go---then tell me!
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I understand. Why can I say that? Because we uprooted our lives to go live in a foreign country. I get the same question all the time, and I find it really hard to answer, to describe. I know when I get home we will fall into the same routine as well. I can say one thing though. You ARE irreversibly changed, as are we. You may not feel different sometimes, but you are. You will always have those experiences, remember those lemons, on the say when it's freezing cold, and raining, and your boss has yet another project for you...
ReplyDeleteI can only imagine how amazing your trip was. Even though you are back to "real life" now you will always have the experience and memories of your journey! I hope you get to go back again!
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